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@Philexvy oh! Why, thank you. Ok, here goes: my name is Julie. I live up in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. I’m the daughter of a Pentecostal preacher; that informs a lot of who I am. I’m living with stage four cancer; that informs a lot of what I do right now. I’m a mom & wife who adores family & community. I’m VERY much a seven, ENFP. I’m here because the Liturgists podcast has been an elemental part of reconstructing my faith in a healing & gentle way. Grateful to be with you all.

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Brazilian artist Evelyn Tannus, known for her tattoo designs on her ceramics #womensart

And the best part of all of this is that I do not have to give up my relationship with my dad. I’ve been super honest with him but also very tactful, only feeding him bits and pieces as I think he can handle it.

I look at him with different eyes now, with eyes of love and a little empathy for what he has had to go through in his own life, and the rigid inflexibility with which he practises his faith. I have no anger for him. Just a wistful sadness and love. ❤️

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In truth I used to be very hurt when my pastor Dad would criticize something I did or said. I would lay awake at night, thinking about his comments over and over again, wondering how I could change to be a better daughter and a better Christian.

None of that happens anymore. Something within the last couple of years of deconstruction has turned a key in my brain and allowed me to separate my feelings from what other people say about me. It feels amazing. I feel strong, happy, grateful.

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Just popping in to say good morning, fellow travellers.

Lately I’ve been exercising a new muscle- slowly & diplomatically starting to drop hints about my faith transformation to family & friends who will criticize this journey.

I have already been called a heretic by my father, told I’m headed for hell, but you guys: it doesn’t hurt! It doesn’t have any angst for me anymore.

I gently told my Dad (whom I still love dearly) that I’m a grown adult now, and his opinion no longer controls me. ❤️

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Thomas Merton quote 

“My worship is a blue sky and ten thousand crickets in the deep wet hay of the field. My vow is the silence under their song.”

Up late, because our province (Alberta) is going through an incredibly polarized and divisive election. I struggle with how to help create real change in the face of a massive political wall, a huge force of negative mindset, stuck in gears and rooted in the past, unwilling to see progress or future or change. It’s so demoralizing, exhausting. I am attempting to do ZEN TIME to fall asleep... 🙏

Okay this is going out on a big limb here, but I’m travelling to Italy this summer and I’d like to spend a day in Assisi- but not doing tourist stuff. I want to have a spiritual experience of some kind of personal connective experience while I’m there. Does anyone have a good recommendation for a person or group I could connect with there? I see there are lots of silent retreats, but they’re generally several days. Just throwing it out there.

I just read these four questions, and then sat for several moments, allowing myself to contemplate the wonder of this. Allowing myself some tears of gratitude, falling over a smile of amazement. I - my words fall short right now.

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I’m generally always excited to read, but I’m REALLY excited about this book. Just picked up my special order copy 😍

In short: I still realize political issues are so important! I want to make a difference! I want to be on the right side of history- but I find this at odds with my desire to live in this moment and detach myself from the outcome. To remove myself from anything that causes pain. In short- how do Buddhist people care about others in n a political sense? 😂 I think this was touched on briefly in the first “Buddhist” session of the series, but I’m struggling with the balance.

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Truly- it’s almost a blockage. Where I used to jump into political discourse with both feet & with a fiery opinion, I start to jump in and then suddenly realize I don’t have the fire to back up my political anger anymore. I start getting worked up about politics and then I start laughing at myself because it’s all just so silly. It just seems so meaningless to get worked up about it anymore. I look at myself from a balcony perspective and think “This won’t matter in ten years.” BUT IT WILL!

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Is anyone else in this circle who is incorporating Buddhist philosophy into their daily practices feeling a bit confused or unable to participate in political issues? The more I focus on disattachment, on removing myself from sources of pain, on mindfulness, the less I find myself able to participate in political discourse. I still have strong political leanings, obviously, but find myself stopping short of political conversation because I can no longer make myself care enough to get worked up?

I just wanted to say a big thank you to all of you who responded on here to my “resilience” post a while back. I did the conference Saturday and it was a beautiful, powerful day. ❤️ Thank you for your input and perspectives, I incorporated them into my talk.

This week’s mood: the only music I want to hear is soaring spiritual experiential music that will put me into a spiritual high- or, like, Peaches. 😂 There’s my vulnerability for the day.

Just catching up on a September edition of the Alien & The Robot, the climate change one. Two phrases struck me: “Climate Messiah” (I think that was @hillarymcbride) and “Moral Imagination.” (That one was William.) Beautiful phrases that make me think- I’m adding those to my lexicon, thankyouverymuch. Great episode.

Hi, friends! I am speaking at a conference next weekend and the focus is on resilience. I just want to pick your brains for a moment. 🧠

Consider a trauma you have gone through. In coming out of that trauma, what’s the biggest realization you had about that trauma or about yourself that you feel contributed in BUILDING resilience within yourself? Or, alternatively, when going through trauma, what do you think blocked you from accessing your inner resilience?

Thank you 🙏

In the city where I live (Edmonton, Alberta), they appoint a “Poet Laureate” each year, a tradition I love. One of these is Mary Pinkoski. I wanted to share her recitation of “Four Leaf Clover,” a poem she wrote for her sister. If you’ve ever felt like you didn’t belong, whatever the context, this is a beautiful recitation for you. May it bring joy to your spirit.

I just : I KNOW that a lot of you are science heads (I’m looking at you @mike) and this sounds crazy. I know that. But I feel that the deconstruction and self-awareness work I am doing- thanks to the Liturgists- has a part to play in this story. I feel more confident and WHOLE then I ever have, in my spirit and body. I’m doing daily energy/meditation work that is hugely supporting my health. I’m hesitant to say this stuff “killed the cancer” but daaaaamn if I know how those tumours disappeared!

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Friends: I don’t know how this happened, at all, but when I went in for my bone scan results at the cancer center here in our city today, my oncologist told me that there’s NOTHING ON MY BONE SCAN.
This doesn’t happen. Sarcoma doesn’t just disappear from bones without treatment. I’m on immunotherapy, but the spots that showed up on last scans GREW during immunotherapy. So the oncologist didn’t attribute it to anything- just shrugged his shoulders and told me to go plan my summer. ‼️

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