@lydia @davidechavez I agree other than the feminist part. I believe a healthy masculine presence balanced with the feminine is important. I teach, and many of my students are openly LGBTQ, and they also know I'm a Christian. They feel comfortable talking with me because I don't judge them or tell them what they should do, etc. I listen more than I talk. At the same time, I have a lot of students from fatherless homes who look to me as a father figure.
So I wonder if the langauge used within feminism sometimes gives the wrong impression. I totally understand the concept of patriarchy and it's negativity, however I think explaining it's complexity to everyone is hard and all many hear is "being paternal is bad". Now really it is not on feminist to make it easy on everyone, but I wonder if there is less triggering terminology. Just a thought.
@WolfDreamer @lydia @davidechavez
It’s hard to have to be “nice” in order to get men to take my concerns seriously. Anger isn’t “allowed,” same as for POC, same as for those of us who have escaped religious settings. Part of being a mature person is both dealing with one’s own enotions and allowing others to have difficult emotions like anger.
@WolfDreamer @hodsonjosh @lydia @davidechavez Sure, but just because a person’s anger isn’t curated perfectly doesn’t mean it is invalid. Men use anger to intimidate and dominate all the time, yet if a woman is seen as “trying to dominate or intimidate” they condemn the entire feminist movement. As a woman, you have to fit the male ideal to be taken seriously (changes from man to man), as a POC you have to act “white,” as a former xtian you have to be still morally “pure,” and “good.”
@abigail @hodsonjosh @lydia @davidechavez That is true, and it's also not okay. Men should also not be using anger to intimidate or dominate. Isn't that part of the deconstructing process, learning to identify our emotions and express them in the healthiest way? What is also needed is grace and understanding because we can't expect immediate compliance from those who are in a different part of their journey than we are. I think of Jesus and how patient he was with his disciples.
I’ve got no quarrel w/ ‘feminism’ as a term. Used to, but I was in the wrong. I was tone-policing & complicit w/oppressive patriarchy. Now I try to invite women to speak up & I try to amplify their voices. Just having similar conversation on BookFace with some fmr students, regarding ‘mansplaining.’ TL;DR: I think we men earned it & we have privilege, therefore term isn’t sexist. Same reason ‘racism’ is specific to marginalized groups IMO. @WolfDreamer @abigail @hodsonjosh @lydia
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