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Hello from the Pacific Northwest. Excited to find a community here with other liturgists. Our current church community is about to learn that my spouse is transitioning (male to female)... not really sure how that will go.... but if anyone here has experience coming out to their congregation, we'd love any tips you have? πŸ˜…

@liz Hi Liz, glad to have you here! I didn't have a church I was attending regularly when I came out, but I did come out to a lot of people I knew from previous church communities. What kind of church do you go to? That makes a big difference for what to expect, I think.

@rebeldinosaur Unfortunately not an affirming denomination (we didn't realize when we joined, also we believed at the time we could be in the closet forever....). Technically the church has no official opinions on trans people, but mostly because they never thought about the existence of trans people before πŸ˜•

@liz That's tough. One thing that could help would be if you can find a smaller group of friends to be a supportive oasis for you and advocate for you within the community. Otherwise, even if the congregation handles it okay, being the token representative for trans people can bring on a lot of emotional labor.

@rebeldinosaur yeah, that's a good point. I can't figure out how much day to day it would be? Maybe it would be a lot at first but then people wouldn't think of it as much? We are already the token interracial couple. People commented at first, but mostly I don't think they think about it anymore (or at least they don't say anything?). Possibly this is different though since it's way less common πŸ˜•

@liz if you want to explore congregations that will be welcoming and need someone to go with let me know

@hope thank you 😊 we have a list of back up churches we've been making, mostly elca so far. We're still hopeful or current church can work, but I'm not sure if that ever really happens. 😬

@liz consider episcopal if it comes to that! My priest is lesbian and her spouse is trans for instance

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