christianity & forgiveness 

So I was talking to a friend about how much a certain mewithoutYou line impacted me (Bullet To Binary Pt. 2: "So why not 'Let's forgive everyone, everywhere, everything, all the time?'")

But how does one engage in such radical forgiveness? I truly believe it's how the cycle of hate is broken. But in practice, you'll be trampled on as your kindness is abused. And maybe such kindness does more harm than good for both parties involved?

christianity & forgiveness 

My initial response is the stoic, "Why should you care if you get trampled on?" and I think there's a lot of truth to that. But I also think it's missing the fact that the forgiver is also an error-prone human, and so we have to constantly tackle what true forgiveness looks like in practice.

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christianity & forgiveness 

@silas
This is the way I approach forgiveness anymore:

I decide to stop letting someone's offense continue to bother me. It's recognizing that they did something to hurt me and that I've done similar things to hurt people myself, and showing grace here is mature and healthy.

If they don't care that they hurt me, I don't have to keep them in my life anymore. That doesn't cancel out my forgiveness and also is mature and healthy.

christianity & forgiveness 

@AlexTheGirl @silas

Agree

Boundaries ≠ Grudge

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christianity & forgiveness 

@JacobTeasdale @AlexTheGirl That makes sense, and is a relief to hear.

Here's our situation: we're a small, tight friend group. The guy we essentially revolve around dated one of us. He was manipulative and doesn't think he did anything wrong. The girl he dated tried to "forgive" him and stick around, but the cycle repeated. She left town since he can't be avoided.

So I guess she feels guilty for leaving, and even if it was right, she lost a lot of her friends. :/

christianity & forgiveness 

@silas @JacobTeasdale

Sounds like a bad guy to revolve around. I hope you all can keep in touch with your friend.

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